Untitled
X-Men #1-23

So this is the real original stuff, it was kind of weird, back at the start Xavier thought that mutants came from radiation caused by the nuclear tests at the end of WWII, his parents having worked on the first atom bomb and at the time he thinks he may be the first mutant. Even at the time his age and that idea didn’t match up, but it doesn’t matter because all of that is retconned out with stuff about the X-Gene, so fuck all that right?

We’ve got our characters

  • Charles Xavier: Professor X

He leads the X-Men, he makes crazy inventions and stuff, he’s a really powerful telepath that can astral project himself and shoot mind bullets, he can conveniently erase the memory of weak minded people to cover their tracks and such

  • Hank McCoy: The Beast

He’s strong but more importantly he’s got super agility and can climb basically anything, he’s really into big words and biz like that, he’s the smartest of the teen mutants and can make inventions like Xavier does

  • Bobby Drake: Iceman

What can we say, he makes jokes and ice, he’s the youngest one which they bring up way too often because it’s not much of an age gap

  • Scott Summers: Cyclops

The deputy leader on the team, he shoots eye beams, during this era his eye beams are considered the strongest power but also they run out super quick when he uses them and he gets all weak, he’s in love with Marvel Girl

  • Warren Worthington III: Angel

He’s a rich guy with an expensive car, he’s old money and he can fly, he’s really good looking and maybe sort of vapid, he’s in love with Marvel Girl

  • Jean Grey: Marvel Girl

She’s telekinetic, which is way more versatile than the others, she’s the team girl for a while because it was written in the sixties and they were really sexist about it for a while, she’s in love with Cyclops

#1

Magneto is introduced, if you don’t know him, he does magnets

So there’s some Danger Room stuff, then Jean Grey shows up, she gets told that now she’s Marvel Girl and then immediately they go out to fight Magneto who keeps stopping new rockets from launching, Magneto claims he’s taking over a military base to take over the world for mutants, but also if you’re a mutant and not Magneto then you’re not fit to rule and he’ll kill you, original Magneto was lame and dumb but luckily most of the things that happen in the first issue sort of get forgotten about later on

#2

This one is about the Vanisher, he can teleport and he gets a bunch of normal human thugs to help him attack the white house and then Xavier uses his brain to solve everything, this was also the era where every threat the X-Men faced was their deadliest threat yet

Sidenote: in this one we see people know about the X-Men and them being mutants and they all love the X-Men

#3

The Blob is introduced, he’s immovable when he plants his feet

Supposedly the Blob is the most dangerous foe in any Marvel work up to now, because you have to overblow everything apparently, the Blob works at a circus, they invite him to join the X-Men, he pretends he wants to then he betrays them and leads an army of circus folk to attack the X-Mansion, they defeat the X-Men and Xavier stops them all with his brain and makes them run back to the circus

#4

This introduces the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants, Magneto is the leader and he’s a dick to everyone, Toad is a retarded jester who can jump, Master Mind has mind powers and evil ambition, Quick Silver and Scarlet Witch are siblings who hate the others but have a life dept to Magneto

Master Mind does a thing so the country of Santo Marco think they’re being shelled and invaded by an army of purple clad dudes, then Magneto sets up a fortress thing and the X-Men go fight him

#5

Toad tricks the X-Men into trying to figure out if he’s a mutant then they realize who he is and fight him till Magneto steals Angel and they follow him to Asteroid M, they save Angel, blow the place up, and get back to Earth

#6

Magneto tries to recruit Namor the Sub-Mariner, then he falls in love with Scarlet Witch, gets burnt out on dealing with surface people, then he goes back to the ocean

#7

The Blob comes back and helps the Brotherhood, then Magneto shoots him with missiles because he wanted to shoot the X-Men even if Blob was in the way, then he gets depressed and goes back to the circus

Sidenote: at the beginning of this one they all graduate Xavier Highschool and are now in Xavier college, which does actually change anything at all

#8

Unus the untouchable beats all the X-Men, then they hit him with a ray that powers him up but after that he can’t even touch things when he wants to and realizes he’ll starve, he agrees to give up if they make his powers go back to their original level

Sidenote: this is the first time we see humans hate mutants even though the first time it happens The Beast saves a child’s life, he’s clearly evil for some reason

#9

Xavier goes alone into a cave to fight Lucifer, the X-Men go to try and save him but the Avengers show up because Thor senses evil, he thinks it’s the X-Men and they fight and it’s like a draw kind of, then they figure out what’s happening and the X-Men go stop Lucifer, it’s revealed that Lucifer is the one who crippled the Prof

by the way they don’t beat him up or even send him to jail or anything, they just sort of let Lucifer leave because back then the X-Men had some pussy pledge to not ever hurt anyone even if they were crazy murderers, apparently being “defeated” was enough

#10

They find a crazy underground Land of the Lost type place and encounter Ka-Zar: Lord of the Jungle

#11

The Stranger shows up and Magneto tries to get him to join the Brotherhood, he keeps just saying “I’m am a Stranger” over and over again, then he turns Master Mind to stone and takes Magneto and Toad to space with alien super being powers to study mutants

#12

Cain Marko was Xavier’s step brother, they fought together in the Korean war and then Marko found the gem of Cyttorak which turned him into the Juggernaut and then he wanted to take vengeance on Xavier for being the favored son, he hated him for being a mutant because he saw Xavier as being better than he was and born lucky, being the Juggernaut means that no physical forces can stop him, the only thing that works is mind bullets, but to use those you have to take off his helmet before he kills you, and he can break anything, they demonstrate this when he lumbers into the X-Mansion

#13

The Human Torch comes and helps them take off Juggernaut’s helmet then they shoot him with mind bullets

#14

Boliver Trask makes Sentinels which are big robots that are supposed to fight mutants for humans, they instantly turn on him and say they’re in charge now, they take him to Master Mold, a quadruple sized Sentinel, the X-Men follow them to their base

#15

X-Men fight and get captured and Master Mold tells Trask to build him more Sentinels

#16

X-Men escape, Xavier shows up with a big crystal that stops the Sentinels for some reason, Trask helps Master Mold just long enough to make a thing explode the whole base and he and Master Mold are buried under rubble

#17

The team is recovering from their fight with the Sentinels and then Magneto comes back from space and takes all of them out except Iceman who is still in the hospital, he puts them into a big metal casing attached to a hot air balloon and sends them to suffocate as they lift up into space, Magneto doesn’t even use his magnets to beat the X-Men, he uses traps and punches them and stuff, he steals Angel’s parents to use them as slaves

#18

Magneto makes a machine that will mass produce mutant clones using the genetics of Angel’s parents, and apparently there are settings to make them mind slaves and have specific powers and stuff, Iceman shows up and stops the machine then Xavier, Cyclops, and Marvel Girl, get the team back to Earth without dying on impact, the Stranger comes back and grabs Magneto and is like “I thought I put you in my space collection, what are you doing back on Earth”

#19

Calvin Rankin also known as the Mimic shows up, he’s got the power to mimic powers or even just favorable traits and abilities from any and all people near him, at first he’s coincidentally trying to beat up Bobby and Hank to steal their girlfriends, they’re surprised when he starts using their powers at them, he runs into Jean Grey and picks up on them being the X-Men, pretends he wants to be an X-Man, fights them and starts losing, one of the only times they manage to beat a guy on first encounter, then he grabs Jean Grey and steals her and they follow him which was his plan all along so he would have their powers at the abandoned mine where he and his father had worked on a machine that would make his powers keep abilities permanently, the Prof tells the X-Men to let him use the thing when he digs it out, then it actually takes away his mimicking power, they then erase his memory of them

#20

Blob and Unus dress up as the X-Men and rob banks, then they’re defeated by the X-Men, turns out this was just a plot to get them to realize someone else was guiding their actions and have Xavier mentally search for who it was, then then Xavier found it was Lucifer his position was given away and Lucifer used a mind weapon on him to negate his mind powers, there’s a flashback to show Xavier stopping Lucifer’s original evil plot where he took over a small country, Xavier defeated Lucifer, but then Lucifer dropped a big stone block on him and made him a cripple, also it turns out Lucifer is an alien trying to take over Earth, they take off in the jet to go fight Lucifer in Utah or wherever

#21

Lucifer has a big facility that controls people’s minds all around the world called Dominus, it has to be run by big robots, so the X-Men beat the robots instead of trying to destroy the facility which is apparently indestructible, the alien leader kills Lucifer by sucking him into space

#22

Count Nefaria hires five super villains to help him with a plot to “steal an entire city— THE CAPITAL OF THE UNITED STATES!” so yeah… Plant Man captures Marvel Girl with chloroform (actually uses the word chloroform), the Scarecrow captures Angel with a net, the Porcupine defeats Beast with a hypnotic disc, and Iceman and Cyclops actually have a decent fight with the Eel and the Unicorn

#23

Having been captured, the X-Men pretend to help Count Nefaria because he put a big dome over DC and he’s going to suck all the air out if Congress doesn’t give him ten million dollars, the five super villains betray Count Nefaria then the X-Men defeat everyone with the help of Xavier who used an exo-skeleton thing to be able to walk around temporarily, then at the end DUN DUN DUUUUUH! Jean gets a letter telling her that her parents enrolled her in college, so from here on she doesn’t live at the X-Mansion, she lives like a mile away

So yeah that was the first 23 issues, they feel crazy dated and I can see why sales were low during the first run of X-Men, I’ll try to keep the descriptions shorter in future, but this first one I just sort of wrote whatever, the ones that were most entertaining were 1, 4, 12, and 22, obviously just a personal opinion, but they were more fun for me than the rest.

X-Men

This is now an X-Men blog, it is about me reading X-Men so I can keep a record of the X-Men I have read. Unsubscribe now if you do not wish to read my shitty opinions about X-Men.

thevintagepostbox:

Illustration: Tea Cats
did-you-kno:

Source

themetaphormachine:

i never have liked the “just girly things” series.

askaoiandfriends:

tophats:

maniclaughter:

cheapb0uquet:

Red Dust

Images captured by various photographers during a freak sandstorm in Sydney, Australia back in 2009.

I FUCKING REMEMBER THIS
It was this orange roughly around 5-6 am, and then by 7-8 it had settled, but all the cars parked outside the previous night were now covered in sand (with dicks drawn on them, lets be real here) and early in the morning the sky was so opaque that the whole shape of the sun was visible to the naked eye. 

Anyone who’d accidentally woken up early to pee would’ve thought they were witnessing the apocalypse. I know I did

Ahyes. This was scary to wake up to, o m f g

i remember that all the kids with asthma (including myself) in my school had to go home or be inside until it was gone


GG: what does THAT mean????? GG: is that supposed to be someone with a halo and goofy teeth? GG: ARE YOU MAKING FUN OF ME?

GG: what does THAT mean????? 
GG: is that supposed to be someone with a halo and goofy teeth? 
GG: ARE YOU MAKING FUN OF ME?

wecansexy:

oh the loss of you does wreck my days / leaves me with a violent hunger

wecansexy:

oh the loss of you does wreck my days / leaves me with a violent hunger

QUICK COMMISSION POST

ghostier:

I’m taking one artistic freedom commission for 15 dollars (paypal only) and it will look something like this!!!!!!!!

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eclectiksoul:

Ken Price

eclectiksoul:

Ken Price